First Day of My Life – Bright Eyes | LOVE

Yours is the first face that I saw
I think I was blind before I met you
Now I don’t know where I am
I don’t know where I’ve been
But I know where I want to go…





Year Four.

Pretty calm, overall. Man, that’s been a wonderful change of pace. This is probably the only year of our marriage that we have actually been able to make a plan and follow it- no matter how simple. Buy a house, settle in, decorate. Check, check, check. It has been so very nice. We’ve been able to get out of survival mode and start setting real goals for ourselves and for our family.


This year I have had a chance to observe and reflect.

Marriage has never been a remotely temporary ideal to me. I would never have married BJ if I didn’t think we’d be married for the rest of our lives. I knew it in my heart, but I also knew it in my head. Had I had doubts about the chances of us having a successful future as a couple, I wouldn’t have married him. And I wouldn’t have wanted to. We lift each other up, pick each other up, make each other {want to be} better.


This year, I have learned that marriage is like living in the houseboat I talked about in my very first post.

Sometimes you’ll rise and fall with the swells. There will be storms and your boat will get damaged. Sometimes the repairs will be one partner’s responsibility, sometimes they will belong to both. Hell, sometimes a crazy person will attack your boat and you’ll have to defend it with your lives. And sometimes, you’ll hold hands as the waves gently rock you to sleep.


This year, I have learned to hold my marriage to my own standards, not the world’s.

I have stopped expecting my life to be a romantic comedy. I don’t shave my legs every {many} day{s}, have dinner on the table when BJ gets home, or a perfect six-pack 5 minutes after having a child {ever}. Some days I don’t brush my hair. My husband doesn’t expect those things of me because those things aren’t what a real life is made of. {Except maybe the hair brushing…}

I don’t expect him to read my mind, {want to} cuddle {who are we kidding, I don’t even like it}, or discuss the intricacies of the plot of Vampire Diaries. But you know what, we like each other {most of the time}. Our real life is laughing at our crazy boy together, loving that our king-sized bed means we can stretch out our arms and not touch, making plans for our home, and taking care of those we love.


This year, I have really settled in to my marriage.

The traditional fourth anniversary gift is fruit or flowers. I got a kid-free weekend in Lawrence, some grocery store flowers, and a pineapple. The latter two things made me cry. I wasn’t expecting anything but the Chick-Fil-A I requested (more for Worth than for myself), but really, it’s the simple things that make me happy.

And happy is what we are. Obviously.

BENNEBELLEWEDDINGPHOTOS2All photos by Tara Miesner Photography.

You can download the song here.

2 thoughts on “First Day of My Life – Bright Eyes | LOVE

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s